Wow! Well, after last week’s post, I’m not sure if I can top that discussion. I want to thank everyone who participated in the discussion for their input and insights, I learned a lot about where I stand on matters of free will.I must admit, I’m a bit intimidated because I feel pressured to write something else that will generate such debate. I don’t know if this will do it or not, but I want to write about a topic I know well from my career background. I’ve bene thinking about women and ageing for some time now, but I haven’t had a good way of expressing myself on the topic until a discussion I had this week with a friend on the topic where I was finally able to express how I felt about it. I’ll explore this a bit now.
It has been my professional experience that over the past ten years, there have been many scientific breakthroughs in the “treatment” of the ageing body and face. This has been reflected by the number of women (primarily, although some men are also concerned), who at one time would have thought there was nothing available to “treat” their ageing skin and resigned themselves to growing old gracefully, are now availing themselves of all sorts of interventions to turn back the hands of time that have been walking across their faces. Not only are the mid-50s and early-60s aged women coming for anti-ageing products and services, but now the typical woman I see at my job are early-40s aged. Now, the “treatment” of ageing has become a mantra of prevention, and younger and younger women are becoming increasingly concerned with the first appearance of wrinkles and lines on their face, sagging breasts and tummies, and under-eye bags. Particularly popular is Botox, a neuro-blocking agent derived from botulism that acts to paralyze the muscle that causes the expression line. For example, try frowning. The two muscles just above the eyebrows that cause your brows to furrow together and create a vertical line between the eyebrows (for some) can be paralyzed by injecting Botox into muscles. The muscles become paralyzed, so when your brain tells your muscles to frown, your muscles do not move AS MUCH. (It is true that some women go overboard and get way too much of this stuff injected, but they are few and far between. It is not likely that all muscle movement will be circumvented by Botox if it is properly administered.)
Ready for the feminist analysis of these anti-ageing “treatments”?
As I have discussed before, feminine beauty is a myth that is socially constructed by those in power in a patriarchal system, and it is self-enforcing, so women internalize femininity norms and self-regulate to enforce the very system that oppresses them. I have also mentioned how women are punished both for participating in beauty norms and for not participating. Also, I’ve discussed that a woman’s best chance of economic and social advancement in society is to get married to a man. Feminine beauty is an expression of women’s usefulness in society: youth symbolizes fertility, and women are at their most useful when they are breeding and raising children. As such, women are relegated to the private sphere of home and family while men move more freely through the world in the public sphere of work, economics and politics. Not that much has changed in the world since women gained the right to vote: women are still highly pressured to get married and have children, and while now women are encouraged to become highly educated, they are still expected to sacrifice their careers for motherhood. If you don’t think this is true, try being a young unmarried woman who is becoming educated. I can tell you from personal experience that it is assumed women will want to get married and have children and when they do they will stop working or at least put their careers on hold to raise children. When people find out that a particular woman is not interested in any of those things, it doesn’t go over well.
Now, add to the mix the rise in divorce. More women are coming onto the dating scene – the “market”, as they say, none too jokingly – for a second time, or a third time even, after experiencing divorce, and often after having children. If a woman is to attract a new man into her life – her best chance of economic security is to re-marry, particularly with dependent children – she must show that she is still young and fertile. Hence, the rise in anti-ageing “treatments”.
One further point: Botox is particularly disturbing, because it not only reduces the appearance of ageing on the skin, but it prevents normal expression of emotion. Women have long been associated with the emotional (rather than the rational) life, and have often been subjugated and dismissed as a result. Botox effectively creates non-expression of emotion, which says, in my view, “we don’t care about your emotions – we don’t want to hear it.” Botox reinforces society’s non-interest in emotions, and in particular the emotions of women. This seems a little bit dangerous to me, and the fact that women are rushing to inject poison into their faces to avoid expressing emotion is indicative of a greater problem in our society: the silencing of women’s emotions.
So, that’s my take on ageing. I would love to see more women embracing their changing bodies, their changing faces, their changing lives, their emotions. I would like to see a society in which all that would be safe for women and would not lead to isolation, abandonment, and economic reliance on men. As it is, women have not so much freedom of choice about the matter: if youth and beauty are linked to economic survival, it makes the waters that much muddier.
oh, and I forgot to mention, I will be away for a short vacation as of tomorrow. I may not be able to check for comments in order to respond, so, in my absence, talk amongst yourselves. 🙂
well…i really don’t have much to say about women and aging…i have been tempted to dye my beard – cause it is very white, and i’m sure it makes me look older than i really am – but ultimately, i decided, i’d rather look older than i am than look like the kind of a guy who is so vain that he has to dye his beard
😉
the other aspects of aging – well, it’s kind of weird – i am in my mid-40’s and i’ve already noticed my vision and hearing deteriorating slightly along with tons of aches and pains – along with slight problems remembering things, etc… – no real serious issues, but by the same token not real encouraging either…on the other hand, beats the alternative, huh…
on the other hand, one plus i see is feeling far less of a need to worry about what other people think of me…i’m kind of understanding the old guys you see in black socks and sandals or with belts and suspenders – they’re doing what they want to – who cares what us punk kids think…
p.s. oddly enough i’m going out of town too – so prob no more comments from me for a while – maybe we all need a rest…
jeez I can relate to this as it is my birthday & all that implies as Every year I get closer to 50. :shudder:
It’s not a pleseant experience…aging. I don’t think it ever has been.
Now that humans have Tecnology to slow down the process, we’ll use it, for sure.
You prob. are right about societys veiws, here. But, it’s not the only pressure in this matter of aging.
I think there is a whole lot of plain human nature involved.
Happy birthday l>t!
“it is assumed women will want to get married and have children”
I may be wrong, but this seems to be (slightly) less the case here in Quebec. I do not mean to pretend that we have a fully equilatarian society (far from), but the gender roles seem less strict. Then again, men are still expected not to care as much about their looks (I do get strange reactions when guys learn that I have different glasses depending on what I’m wearing, that I am, in fact, accessorizing).
“Botox reinforces society’s non-interest in emotions, and in particular the emotions of women.”
It’s a bit like wanting women to lokk like pictures, plastic. I’ve never been comfortable with the whole idea of injecting (bovine) botulism in your muscles; but I find it hard to judge, not being in this situation, the individual choices. But I do agree about your analysis of the social pressure.
But what about Madonna? 😉
Acually, i see quite a few men on TV doing the botox thing. & some executive types I know are really big into their looks. Image & all that.
It’s all just shallow focusing. The appeals of youth & beauty are shoved into our faces all the time, everywhere we turn. What do we expect?
Women have a polarity that we have created, ourselves. To blame the male dominated society is a fallacy. We have been taught by our mothers, our friends, and our families that we want to grow up and get married. This is the ‘true nature’ of womanhood.
How do we accomplish this goal? By painting our faces, wearing shoes that hurt, sucking in, taking yoga, starving, binging, only to get back on the diet marry-go-round, shed our friends to spend all our time with ‘him’ with the unrealistic expectation he will fulfill us and give us direction to utilize our full potential.
I gave most of that up years ago. I do want to attract a mate but they will meet me on my terms. I wear make up when I feel like it. I am not going to beat myself up because I don’t look like the chick on TV. And my happiness doesn’t depend on the youthful look of my face, only the youthfulness to my spirit.
When we, as women, quit mocking the fat chick down the block for being fat or looking down at our sisters who want to stay home to bring up the next generation, we might have a chance. There may be hope that we can be comfortable in our own skin.
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Thanks mark. 🙂
Amen, Frida.
@I>T,
You are nearing to 50 ? shudder !!! *smile*…the more you get old the more experience you have. That’s what how i see. I find your daughter and son cute and their respective boyfriend and girlfriend. I always respect old age. It is my Future.
@Thinking girl,
Not only women go through these traumas…Men too!!! But it is more common in women I agree. I am happy that you brought up the issue of ‘market’ and I loved the way you talked about the truth and reality – she must show that she is still young and fertile –
Why is it always ‘women’s beauty is more important then men ? Why not men take care of their body too to attract women ? Women is always viewed as a sexual object. I hate it. The day men have their crises of saying…’i have to get insde the market too’ I shall say the justice is done.
Happy Holidays.
Hey all,
Well, I am back from my fun and active mini-vacation to the beautiful Prince Edward Island. If any of you have a chance to go sometime, I highly recommend it. I love PEI! I have been many times, and it only gets better. We also went to Cape Breton, which is in Nova Scotia, and it is also very beautiful. I love PEI more, however! The people we encountered were truly wonderful, generous and kind.
Good job of talking amongst yourselves while I was away! Thanks for all the comments everyone!
l>t, I do agree, I think there is a natural inclination to try to ward off death by preventing the ageing process, and this seems to be a relatively universal human desire regardless of gender. This definitely plays into what Mike says about noticing the little aches and pains that remind a person of one’s own fatality. However, the pressures are far more for women than for men, as we see so often through marketing, media, movies, magazines, etc.
Yes, Mike, I do like the whole thing about not caring so much what other people think of you. It’s a whole being comfortable in one’s own skin thing.
Quebec is, I think, so much more progressive than Canadian society at large in so many ways – which is more progressive than American society. I love Quebec! Quebec gets the whole importance of taking culture forward by preserving it while embracing modern ideas. Maybe I’ll do my next degree in Montreal?
Frida, welcome! Thank you for visiting my blog! What you say has some truth to it – women do teach one another how to be feminine from a young age, and ongoing through beauty services like having your hair done, getting a pedicure, etc. However, looking deeper at the reasons behind femininity practices tells a story of male domination. You should have a look at a couple of earlier pieces I wrote for this blog, Feminine Beauty and Competition – both of which explain the bases of WHY women practice femininity practices – economic and social advancement through attracting a mate – and WHY femininity practices are oppressive to women. I applaud your embracing of a beauty that you define for yourself!
Prash, thanks for pointing out the importance of recognizing how treatments that target women’s beauty and ageing are capitalist practices that make money for some people – mostly for companies largely owned by men, by the way. Of course these companies are going to play into our insecurities – or even create whole new ones! – in order to sell their products and make more millions. And, I agree that men should indeed take better care of themselves as well! Or, alternatively, less emphasis could be placed on appearances and we could all spend time getting to know one another and allow ourselves to be attracted to different people for different reasons.
Another interesting point here, Prash, is that the whole beauty thing as a way to attract a man is premissed on an assumption of heterosexuality. What about beauty as it relates to lesbians? How about gay men and ageing? What are the effects of these marketing campaigns on homosexual and bisexual people?
oh, and Marc Andre – I’m thinking about Madonna. Don’t worry. 🙂
When is the pursuit of beauty a good thing? When is it bad?
I think I might venture to answer my own question by suggesting that the relationship of beauty to health must be an important factor.
If the pursuit of beauty is at the same time a pursuit of greater health, I would be inclined to suppose that the pursuit is a good thing. But, if the pursuit of beauty leads to ill health, or compensates for a lack of self care, then we might agree that it is a bad pursuit.
Still, I think there are likely some pitfalls in this reasoning, but I am too tired to think it through any further right now.
The thought also occurs to me that the positive or negative value of the pursuit of beauty somehow depends on another factor: namely, the development of one’s inner strength–and of one’s inner beauty, for that matter. If one makes a real effort to strengthen one’s inner self–and if we end up with a strong sense of our inner beauty–it seems to me that any additional time spent in pursuit of physical beauty will not likely prove to be a bad thing. (Although it might still be a problem for those who feel the need to emulate, without understanding.)
In people who don’t take as much care of themselves on the inside–perhaps through no fault of their own–it often turns out to be a catastrophe.
Maybe the people who are well developed on the inside just don’t go to extremes to change the outside–or maybe they do, but are too strong to suffer the ill effects.
Hmmm. I may be rambling. Time for bed.
oh but we now have L’Oreal anti ageing creams for men, too… 😉
i have just blog-hopped into your blog, and i love your style of writing!
but i dont agree that youth and beauty are always prerequisites for success, as you say society seems to say. maybe just in the Western world, but i dont agree that more and more women are scared of ageing…
maybe it is just the hype that is created by magazines/media, that gives us the impression that there are more and more women like that?
or maybe im just a narrowminded person, looking at only the people around me? lol. 🙂 nah, maybe people from elsewhere think differently… i guess it all depends on external factors, the media, what everyone else does, etc.
i loved your last paragraph – and i could not agree more with it. but alas, such is this male-dominated world, eh?
hey mister p:
I suppose the answer to your question depends on whether you hold a Platonic view of beauty. Plato claimed that things exist “out there” in a pure form: he talked of “the good” and “the beautiful” for example. Plato’s forms are objective, existing outside of time and space, and the physical expression of a form is an echo, a representation, a likeness, of the pure form. So, if you think beauty exists separate from its physical manifestations, and is something that can be applied or represented to varying degrees in people and things, then the pursuit of beauty is harmless, as it is beauty “for its own sake”.
or you could hold the view that there is no such thing as “beauty” per se, but that the idea of beauty is socially constructed, in which case its pursuit is not as important as the reasons for its pursuit. Why pursue beauty? Because it has social value.
or you could take the view that beauty is a matter of biology: that beauty is something that is pleasing for various reasons relating to fertility, health, virility, vim and vigour, etc. such that a more beautiful person would be better equipped to propogate the species or provide for a family. survival of the prettiest.
I tend to think it’s a combination of the 2nd and 3rd. However, how do we explain the use of the word “beauty” in relation to objects or natural occurences, like art and sunsets? Is it a concept that can be applied to various contexts if it has to do with biology and sociology? has it been co-opted by the art world? or was Plato onto something?
Welcome, anonymous! thanks for stopping by. do you think that in claiming that more women are seeking out anti-ageing treatments, I assume too much, and women aren’t afraid of ageing? In this piece, I am speaking from professional experience (I am an aesthetician in a plastic surgery clinic), and over the past 11 years I’ve been in this job, more and more women of younger ages are telling me their stories about why they are there. Some tell me they feel invisible, like nobody looks at them anymore. Some people tell me they feel that men do not look at them anymore and they don’t like that. Some tell me they think it will give them a professional edge to look younger. Some tell me they have been taking care of other people and neglecting themselves for too long and want to start taking care of themselves because they have realized nobody else is going to do it for them. Some tell me about a recent breakup and a desire to look more attractive to men in order to find a new mate. (familiar with the concept that once you have a husband, you don’t have to worry about your looks anymore or put so much energy into your appearance because you’ve “got him”? the phenomenon of divorce has changed all of that – there is a fear going on that if you don’t continue to strive for beauty, your husband will leave you for a younger, more beautiful woman.) All these things make me lean toward thinking not that marketing and advertisements make it seem like women are seeking youth more, but that the marketing is actually working. I’m not just talking about marketing specifically for beauty and anti-ageing products, but all the marketing of female sexuality to sell everything from cars to deodorant to beer. It seems like the only commercials not representing women as sex objects are those for kids products, cleaning supplies, and home improvement. But when women are represented in only one of two ways – mother/wife or sex object – there is a real problem going on when women buy into those images as the only images.
Is fear of ageing “a relatively universal human desire regardless of gender”?
As o anonymous says, “maybe just in the Western world (…) maybe people from elsewhere think differently…”
I always hesitate to use the term universal, even qualified: I’m not sure this is the case in villages in Cameroun or Laos, for example. Which tends to support the idea that it is a cultural/marketing trend.
“Some people tell me they feel that men do not look at them anymore and they don’t like that.” This manifests not only in ant-ageing treatments, I have known women (and men) who have cheated on their partner to confirm that they are still attractive to others. There is real value attached to attractiveness.
true enough, Marc Andre. I think you and anon are right to address it as a western phenomenon.
sad that we place so much emphasis on appearance.
looking at this ‘technically’, your market research isn’t wide enough to prove the theory that women fear ageing. (sorry if that sounds blunt… im just voicing my opinion here… no offense meant! :))
you only have the people around you, and the ‘world’ around you to make that point. and add to that the fact that your profession requires seeing ‘concentrated’ cases to prove your point, yes. i do think that you assume too much. much as i know every individual’s thoughts and what they have noticed are important and contribute to the bigger picture, i think that that is as far as it goes.
your view is a part of the puzzle. a very significant part, of course, because no piece of the puzzle can be undermined (since the whole picture cannot be seen with pieces missing…), but i think still a piece of the puzzle.
sorry to be mean/harsh… if you consider it like that… 🙂
thanks for your comments, anon. I never claimed to be reporting on a sociological study, but rather am making observations based on my experience and my study of feminist theory as it relates to beauty and ageing. However, if you would like more solid “evidence”, take a look at these stats on plastic surgery, from cosmeticplasticsurgerystatistics.com. Stats are american.
From 2003-2004, there was a 44 percent increase in the total number of cosmetic procedures. Surgical procedures increased by 17 percent, and nonsurgical procedures increased by 51 percent.
Since 1997, there has been a 465 percent increase in the total number of cosmetic procedures. Surgical procedures increased by 118 percent, and nonsurgical procedures increased by 764 percent.
The top five surgical cosmetic procedures in 2004 were: liposuction (478,251, up 24 percent from 2003); breast augmentation (334,052, up 19 percent); eyelid surgery (290,343, up 8 percent); rhinoplasty (166,187, down 4 percent); and facelift (157,061, up 25 percent).
The top five nonsurgical cosmetic procedures in 2004 were: Botox injection (2,837,346, up 25 percent from 2003); laser hair removal (1,411,899, up 53 percent); chemical peel (1,110,401, up 54 percent); microdermabrasion (1,098,316, up 28 percent); and hyaluronic acid (Hylaform, Restylane) (882,469, up 659 percent).
Women had nearly 10.7 million cosmetic procedures, 90 percent of the total. The number of cosmetic procedures for women increased 49 percent from 2003.
The top five surgical procedures for women were: liposuction, breast augmentation, eyelid surgery, tummy tuck and facelift.
Men had nearly 1.2 million cosmetic procedures, 8 percent of the total. The number of cosmetic procedures for men increased 8 percent from 2003.
The top five surgical procedures for men were: liposuction, eyelid surgery, rhinoplasty, male breast reduction and hair transplantation.
People age 35-50 had the most procedures — 5.3 million and 45 percent of the total. People age 51-64 had 25 percent of procedures; age 19-34 had 22 percent; age 65-and-over had 6 percent; and age 18-and-younger had 2 percent. Racial and ethnic minorities had 20 percent of all cosmetic procedures. Hispanics, 8.5 percent; African-Americans, 6.2 percent; Asians, 4.6 percent; and other non-Caucasians, 1.1 percent.
Now, none of these stats PROVE that women are AFRAID of ageing, but it certainly seems to follow my assessment of anti-ageing procedures being on the rise (eyelid surgery increasing 8% and facelifts 25%, with increases in Botox at 25%, microdermabrasion at 28% and chemical peels at 54%) and women being the primary takers at 90%. If women are not scared of ageing, why are they running in droves to plastic surgeons for procdures that will make them look younger?
Of course, I fully understand your comment, because the folks who can generally afford to have anti-ageing procedures are middle to upper class, and so these stats may not be applicable to women from all social groups. So we are beginning to get a more complete picture of who is having anti-ageing procedures: white middle-upper class women between 35-50 years old. Funny that these are the women with the most social power… those who have the most to lose? what do you think?
Wouldn’t you know? I am still mulling this subject over, and still trying to answer my own question.
It occurs to me that an important factor in what makes the pursuit of beauty a bad thing, is the tendency to try to standardize beauty and mass-produce it.
At that point, it seems to me, that our society is highly motivated to reproduce beauty. Those motivations are many. Greed and lust are obvious impetuses (impetii?) in the drive to over-produce beauty. But even the more sublime motivations (the desire to educate, the desire to help) play their part as well–and perhaps even share in the culpability for the often negative consequences.
I am not willing to go so far as to say that the attempt to reproduce beauty is always bad–beautiful art can be reproduced and still be beautiful. A copy of a Van Gogh here, or a Klee there, makes the beauty accessible, rather than keep it locked up in a collection in a far away place. But mass replication can turn a work of great quality into a caricature of itself.
It seems to me that this applies to art, it applies to music (think “Stairway to Heaven”, think “Bolero”). And I think it also applies to people. At the individual level, many of our problems seem to revolve around a weird need to make ourselves beautiful like all the others. When the need to reproduce beauty is applied to people, it is not just that the beauty becomes cheapened and devalued. It can also become unhealthy either mentally or physically.
I still need to think more about this topic. Meanwhile, I am left asking myself several questions: To what extent is uniqueness a necessary component of beauty? At what point does the replication of beauty turn to merely a facsimile of beauty? And, perhaps more to the point, have we become completely desensitized to the relation of uniqueness to beauty? And, if we could learn to resensitize ourselves, would that help curb our appetite for trying to recklessly reproduce it?
[I am still not sure, but I suspect these are important questions. One reason I think so is because this factor seems, more so that most others, to apply as well to art, to nature and to humans.]
I like very much what (you) Mister Pregunto – said about Beauty and Health. Women obviously – disproportionately have eating disorders – which endanger their lives. Models – often are women’s sizes – 1,2 or occasionally 4 in US sizes – while the average USian women is a size 16 – a HUGE difference.
I can’t imagine a Male Personals Ad -saying – Man 55, looks 35 – but for a Woman – this obviously is often important.
Appreciating our bodies – helping make them More of What we want through sensible diet and exercise seems important to me.
I also recognize that as a middle-aged/aging White Male – I have privilige -that I may be judged as a “befuddled” or a little worse – but I’m not generally discriminated against or hurt by how I look.
My partner – being Black, Not Close to Thin – based upon her life experiences wants to “fit in” and “not be noticed” – where “looking nice” is much, much more important.
I can’t identify – which the importance of “Hair” and makeup secondarily. It seems more healthy to me where “painted faces” – are fun rituals and “being silly” – rather than the “religion” – that they are to so many – particularly Women – but also – among increasing numbers of men.
I find it very sad – that both we can’t accept and grown within our bodies often and that as a result we often – live self-destructively and not in tune – with our inner heart based essence.
Thanks!
geo
thanks for those comments guys!
mister P, I’m so glad this post provoked a lot of thinking for you. You are on to something. Beauty is becoming mass-produced, isn’t it, with the advancement of plastic surgery in particular. I think that uniqueness is very important in beauty, because I think beauty should be interesting and stimulate the mind. (Such an intellectual!) the conveyor belt beauty that we have going on lately is to me very bland and boring.
Geo, again, a brilliant point. Being so focussed on outward beauty really does diminish the time and attention we give to inner beauty. Doing things to our bodies in search of perfect beauty and pretending it doesn’t affect our spirits is a sad mistake.